Dear Prime Minister (unelect),
I hope this letter finds you in the same good cheer with which it left me. You see i write to you with a positive and optimistic attitude that we are going to come through these difficult times with smiles on our faces. Over the Christmas and new year period, i was stung by the CSA for £121 a week, YES Gordon, that's one hundred and twenty one pounds, join that up with the facts that the company i work for (and not a bad company as it happens) had to cut down working hours to bare minimum and i had three weeks pay to get me through the holiday period, you can just imagine that i didn't have a lot of money to tide us over, why i even had to borrow off friends (oh the humiliation), YES Gordon, friends, not the sort you buy with promises of peerages for donations, but real, solid friends that stand by you through thick and thin. I wonder if you will have the good fortune to know such people when your time is at hand? I've heard they're already talking behind your back and think you are a little how shall we say, out of your tree? Personally i think you are looking a little bit tired. Let's ask the readers, what do you think readers? Do you think our (piss) poor unelected PM is looking a little tired? Anyhow, as i've said we got through this particularly difficult period during which i vowed that it would never happen again with the help of friends, and all of a sudden i find myself in possession of an 07 plate car? Does that astound you? Did you really think you'd fucked up this country so badly that NOBODY would be able to have anything decent? If you did think that Gord, then i think that it is a very childish attitude and certainly not becoming a man who would believe that he "saved the world". I see this car as a landmark in my determination to get myself out of this financial shit-heap i currently find myself in. And get myself out i will.
Others may not be so fortunate, after all who could fail to notice the daily reports of people all over the UK losing their jobs? Jobs that were once grounded in a flourishing economy, which has been all but destroyed by your thieving, conniving cabinet of butt sucking pigs. An economy you insist was destroyed by problems starting in America? Well there's gratitude, a great nation who stood by ours through two world wars and you repay them by blaming them for our current financial mess? No Gord, the blame lies squarely at your door. You promised "British jobs for British workers"...try to deny it and i'll have you fed to the dogs. Yet we see that oil refinery construction jobs are going to Italian and other migrant workers, a big kick in the balls for the thousands of British people being laid off everyday in your "Cool Britannia" wouldn't you say? And don't you DARE try and accuse me of being racist, I am just thinking about the future of this country, something which you are evidently not doing. Never mind, whitey/blacky or whatever think tank hare brained label you come up with to try to keep us all divided, I have come to the conclusion that each and everyone of us are niggers as far as you and your trough-nosed, champagne swilling socialist pals are concerned.
But the point here Gord is this....I wish you no ill will, after all i want you to be around to watch the destruction of your Nero-esque little empire, an empire which really doesn't stretch much beyond your imagination but does have far reaching consequences in the real world. Yes Gord, i know you will be fiddling while it burns as you have been fiddling all along, but rest assured, you will not pass another General Election and remain in office. For Heavens sake man!!! You are supposed to be running a country, not playing with toys in your fucking attic. I would in all sincerity request that you resign right now to save yourself further humiliation at the polling booths next year, but being a realist, i know there are two chances of you doing that, half a chance and no fucking chance. However i do take a little comfort in the fact that as next year will mark thirteen years of Zanu Labour misrule, then i think it poetic justice that your long awaited and well deserved kick in the bollocks would be meted out in that year.
Yes Gordon, i want you to watch, open mouthed as it will be US, the PEOPLE of this Great Nation, who steer us out of these hard times, and not your fat, lardy-arsed self with your bloated, deluded, megalomaniacal party of pig-swill quaffers......
ps. Love to Sarah and the kids